My Keto Rap
I’ve tried every diet that is under the sun,
Every time I begun, it was just no fun.
They all made me hungry based on calorie restriction,
But I’ve found a diet that is stranger than fiction.
Cabbage Soup Diet, Mediterranean Diet,
South Beach Diet, why don’t you try it?
All the advertising messages causing confusion,
Try Atkins, Weight Watchers, Try Asian Fusion.
Well I tried them all, over the years,
The one thing in common, they bring me to tears.
I might lose a bit but it comes back on the scales,
In 2019 human beings look like whales.
Forty years ago hardly anyone was fat,
I checked on the net, the facts are that.
So in forty years everybody got lazy?
Five billion lazy? That’s just too crazy!
They say we eat too much, don’t exercise enough,
So when we get fat, well that’s just tough.
But the facts are showing that’s not the reason.
The reason we’re growing drives me to treason.
For a generation we’ve been given dietary advice,
Eat bread, cereals, pasta, rice.
I don’t believe in conspiracies, but I want to cry,
Because the food pyramid was just a big lie.
Refined carbohydrates, considered the foundation,
Have caused untold havoc, made us a fat nation.
We listened, got radicalised, ate what we were told.
The food industry advertised, and cereals sold.
Did they do it on purpose, did money talk?
Now thousands of people who can barely walk.
Obesity, diabetes, heart attack city,
It gets worse every year, I look at fat people with pity.
Should we give governments benefit of the doubt?
Assume advertisers money didn’t have clout?
I don’t know but let’s go past the political,
Let’s talk biological, and examine the physical.
This is counterintuitive , I know how it sounds,
But eating fat food doesn’t make you gain pounds.
People get fat because of insulin resistance,
Your willpower doesn’t matter, nor your persistence.
When you eat carbs, your blood sugar rises,
Your pancreas release insulin, so far no surprises.
All excess glucose, which you don’t use for fuel,
Gets stored in your muscles as a glyco molecule.
But with the amount of carbs we consume in the west,
Our pancreas and livers, they never get rest.
There’s too much to process; blood sugar stays high,
Metabolic syndrome, diabetes, cause people to die.
Conventional advice says keep your fat low.
For forty years we followed, we continued to grow.
High carbs made us fat, and hungry as hell,
But if you want to lose weight, I have a story to tell.
There’s thousands of people cured of obesity disease,
No more inflammation, no more pain in the knees.
Their bodies now have the perfect hormonal cocktail,
Keeping insulin low, means they no longer fail.
So what is the secret to health and vitality?
It’s making a ketogenic lifestyle your new normality.
I don’t say Keto diet, because it doesn’t finish,
You stay on on it for life and watch your fat levels diminish.
The best part of Keto is that hunger subsides,
It’s like magic happening in your insides.
Every other diet I’m always starving, craving.
But on Keto I’m satisfied, it’s just amazing.
Seventy per cent fat, twenty five percent protein
Five per cent carbs, and now I’m so lean.
No counting calories, eat as much as I like,
The fat can’t arrive with no insulin spike.
I have bacon and eggs, it’s not a dream,
My belly’s getting smaller eating whipped cream.
Avocados, nuts, let me eat that smoked salmon.
Some cream cheese too, watch the weight loss happen.
After two weeks you become fat adapted,
This is the best decision that I ever enacted.
Your cravings for carbs well they just disappear,
And take a look in the mirror, because so has your rear.
I hope with this rhyme that I make you consider,
What to put on your plate when you eat dinner.
Go and research Keto if you’re a beginner,
Then execute like a winner, enjoy being thinner!